Crucial Craziness

Anthroponomastics-A thorough analysis of the history of the geography of my name

on June 25, 2010

“What’s this spelling?”

“How do you pronounce your name?”

“Haha….very funny!”

“Why this ‘H’ here?”

As people keep asking me about my name’s unique (strange/confusing/conflicting/odd) spelling,I’m now providing all details about it.

THE MOKKA MEANING  JUSTIFICATION

Dhivhya means divine.

Yes….I know you don’t agree.

People always love contrasts.Khatta-meetha,black and white and especially telugu’s  love pink pantu and green shirtu.

When

Vellapandian can be black (oh…please understand-it’s not colour discrimination)

Pacha kili cannot be a green parrot and

Chinna Ponnu can be 97 years young

I can be Dhivhya.

JUSTIFIED.No more cross questions.

KOLLYWOOD AND DIVYA

The name Divya and Tamil movies are inseparable.

Mani Ratnam’s Mounaraagam-Revathy -Divya

Kaadhal Kondaen-Sonia Agarwal-Divya (remember dhanush’s divya…divya…divya…divya dance?)

Autograph-Sneha-Divya

There are numerous other examples to show how this name is so notable and celebrated.

MORAL:The name Divya always signifies awesomeness and so do the people.Accept it.

THE H FACTOR

My mom added 2 H’s in my name to make it lucky for me.Numerology,she says.

Here are the explanations I give.

1)THE ‘ENNA CHATTI’ THEORY

It’s according to the actual Sanskrit pronunciation with emphasis on ‘ha’.So,don’t make fun of it.

If you do so it,you do a negative karma  by violating moral and ethical codes and it’s against Dharma,the moral order.

You would be cursed,sent to hell and deep  fried  in an ‘enna chatti’ (large frying vessel ) with 100% unrefined  coconut oil.

People get scared and they leave me alone.

2)THE I-WILL-MAKE-YOU-MAD EXPLANATION

Do you know numerology? It is a system that defines esoteric  relationship between numbers and  living things.

There is life path number,soul urge number,inner dream number and the numbe….the person runs away

3)THE ‘ Domaru Dapsa’ THEOLOGICAL SYSTEM

It’s top secret.The Swamiji’s who have been doing Tapas in Himalyas for the past 100 years have asked me not to reveal it to anyone because it’s spirituality is lost.

THE Vaayilaye nozhayaliye PRONUNCIATION GAME

1)They say dihi vihi yah that sounds like a TB patient coughing.

2)They give an expression as though they are suffering from nagging tooth ache and I clearly understand that it’s my name.

VALUE ADDED SERVICES

1)I get a perfect email id in gmail,yahoo and any other site.

I needn’t have to use dhivhya007, dhivhya_crazygirl, dhivhya18rocks, 53xydhivhyabuddy,dhiv_12r67i_hya that are even more scarier than my name’s spelling.

2)I can have a proper site address like dhivhya.wordpress.com 😛

3)I’m easily googlable.

4)There are minimum 3-4 Divyas in every class that I can remain quiet whenever my name is called out to answer questions.

Some other divya gets up and starts answering.

5)When someone calls this name,though I know clearly that the wanted divya is not me,I say,”Mam,I don’t know if it’s me.May I check it out and return?”-ESCAPE!

PRECAUTIONS:

1)To Boys:If your ‘aalu’ (not potato) is Divya,please write their initial while writing lovvu letters.There’s a greater chance of misinterpretation and you love life would become a complexly complicated confused chinese noodles.

If  her initial is ‘S’,I’m sorry 5 out of 10 Divyas are S.Divya

2)To girls:Don’t get over excited when your name is called.According to the Bejaara-Pootchu-pa  theory of common names,there is a probability of 0.00099  that the called Divya is you.

RECOMMENDATION:

If you ever be to Chennai and see a smart,beautiful,intelligent,naughty,confident,humorous,talented girl,please don’t ask “What is your name?”.

Ask,”Is your name Divya”.

The answer would be 9/10 times right!

The author is well experienced writer who has been a victim of  Divya confusions.

If  you have any objections,you are advised to blindly accept the facts.

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